Helping Teens and Families Live Happier Lives
Helping Teens and Families Live Happier Lives
Helping Teens and Families Live Happier Lives
Helping Teens and Families Live Happier Lives
How do you talk to your middle school tweenager about heavy topics like suicide? Well, let's
talk about that today on Tips on Teens. My name is Kent Toussaint. I'm a licensed marriage and
family therapist, and I specialize in helping kids, teens, and families to live happier lives.
I lead two organizations, Teen Therapy Center and the nonprofit 501c3 organization, child
and teen counseling, both here in Woodland Hills, California. Every Wednesday at noon, I jump
onto Facebook Live to answer your parenting questions. Let's answer today's. There have been
several reported runaways and suicide attempts at our middle school this semester. How should
I be talking to my kids about this without freaking them or me out? Thank you for your question.
This is a really tough one. I totally understand the discomfort and the fear aligned with all
this. How you talk about it, the first thing is make sure that you are feeling grounded and comfortable
or at least able to embrace the discomfort of the conversation.
Because if you're scared of it, and you're hesitant, your kids are going to pick up on that. And
they're going to be just as hesitant, if not more. So it's really important that you're doing
your work on yourself, whether that's through journaling, talking to your own therapist or
whatever that is, make sure you feel you can talk about this in a direct and respectful manner.
Second, let's create an environment where there's little to no distraction where you guys
can talk. Maybe that's in the car, maybe that's in her bedroom or in the kitchen table. And again,
that is without a cell phone present. I know that's a challenge, but that's, you know, the cell
phone just going to get in the way. Third is just talk about a directly with some compassion.
You know, you can say, Hey, I know, there's been a lot of, you know, suicide attempts at school
lately. And I imagine it's got to be kind of tough. I'm curious how you're feeling about it. Now,
you may get the you know, don't let that throw you.
It's okay. Stay in the conversation and say, Well, if I were you, I would have a lot of feelings.
And I just want you to know that I want to be a safe place for you to talk about that. And you may still
get the shrugging of shoulders and say, Hey, you know, I just want to make sure you're feeling
safe and you don't feel alone because a lot of times suicide or running away comes from the same
place of feeling trapped, feeling overwhelmed, feeling like you don't know what to do. And
so it feels like, you know, it's the cliche line. It's the permanent solution to a temporary
problem. Some kids relate to that. Some kids won't, it just depends. But I want to make sure you
don't feel trapped. And I'm wondering, have you ever felt this way? Have you ever felt like you
need to kill yourself or run away to escape your problems? Right now, I know the alarm bells in
your head are ringing, like, I can't say that. I'm gonna give them the idea, and you're not. You're
not. If they haven't thought about
it, they're likely to say, no, and roll the eyes, and you can probably take them at their word.
If you ask the question, hey, have you thought about suicide before, or running away, and you
get the long pause, or you just get the hmm there may be something more there and I think it's okay
to acknowledge that hey you know your long pause or your ambiguous answer you know makes me concerned
because I love you so much I want to make sure that you don't feel alone and you don't feel trapped
and if you can't talk to me I want to make sure you have someone to talk to whether that's your cousin
whether that's a therapist whether that's your rabbi whoever that is someone who can be a support
for your teenager and or teenager. And if you need to find that person, I encourage you to find
that person. But it's talking about, you know, coping skills that you know, through creativity,
through physical activities, social activities, grounding exercises, exercises like breathing
exercises, there's a lot
of things that help, but helping them understand that being alone with these feelings is overwhelming.
Sharing these feelings in a safe place where you're not going to feel judged, where you're going
to feel supported, not necessarily that you're going to give the answers, just that you can
just listen and understand may be enough. And I think it's helping to create those environments
and helping them understand that those environments are there. Also providing the 988, the
National Suicide Hotline. So if they have, you know, three in the morning they can't sleep and
they don't want to wake you up, but they're willing to call 988, that's an option too. It's a big
topic. Again, running away and suicide, painting with a broad brush here, often come from the
same place of feeling overwhelmed, feeling like these problems are beyond one's capacity
to handle and it'll never end. As adults, we know, most of us, that problems come and go. And no
matter how big the problem is, eventually it passes.
And it depends not, the problem is not what defines us, it's how we respond to the problem. and
helping our kids understand how we respond to problems is what defines us, who we are, not the
problem itself. This is a huge topic, obviously, and I'm going to scratch the surface a little
bit, but I think it's really important to talk about kids directly about this in an open and healthy
conversation, not trying to convince them, not trying to change their minds, but help them
understand that you understand how they feel. That's our question for today. Again, my name
is Kent Toussaint with Teen Therapy Center. If you want more information, give us a call at our
phone number below. We love to hear your questions. If you want me to answer your question here
on Tips on Teens, you can email us at tipsonteens at teentherapycenter .com. You can also join
our Facebook group, Tips on Teens. We'd love to have you join. Thanks again, and I'll see you
guys next week. Bye -bye.
Empowering Teen Mental Health and Family Well-Being: How Teen Therapy Center Helps Teens and Families Thrive
At Teen Therapy Center, our mission is simple yet profound: to help children, teens, and families live happier, more fulfilling lives. We’re passionate about what we do, and we’re good at it. We like to say “we speak teen and we speak parent.” Through our unique approach, we break down the barriers that often exist between teens and their parents, fostering open, honest communication. This is achieved by our dedicated team, who are not just experts in their fields but also know how to connect with both teens and parents in a way that resonates.
Understanding Teen Mental Health
The teenage years are a period of immense change, growth, and challenges. Teen mental health is a critical area of focus at Teen Therapy Center because we understand the unique struggles teens face today. From navigating social pressures to managing academic expectations, teens often encounter overwhelming stress. Unfortunately, this can sometimes lead to more serious mental health concerns, such as anxiety and depression.
Anxiety in teenagers is more common than many realize. The constant pressure to excel in school, fit in socially, and plan for the future can create significant stress. This anxiety, if not addressed, can hinder a teen’s ability to enjoy life and achieve their full potential. Our therapists work closely with teens to help them identify the sources of their anxiety and develop effective coping strategies.
Depression in teens is another critical issue that we address. It’s not just sadness; it’s a pervasive feeling of hopelessness that can affect every aspect of a teen’s life, from their relationships with family and friends to their academic performance. Our therapeutic approach is designed to meet teens where they are, offering them a safe space to express their feelings and guiding them toward a brighter outlook on life .We believe that the mental health of a teenager is intricately connected to the well-being of the entire family. That’s why we offer family therapy for teens. Family dynamics can be complex, and when a teen is struggling, it often affects the whole family. Family therapy helps to address these challenges by improving communication, resolving conflicts, and strengthening the bonds that hold the family together.
At Teen Therapy Center, our family therapy sessions are tailored to meet the unique needs of each family. Whether it’s helping parents understand their teen’s perspective, resolving long-standing conflicts, or simply providing a space for open dialogue, our therapists are here to support you every step of the way. We work to create an environment where every family member feels heard and valued, and where positive change can take root. When we treat a teen, we treat the whole family.
A Team That Truly Cares
Our staff is a group of fun-loving professionals who come from a variety of backgrounds, bringing a wealth of experience and diverse perspectives to the table. This diversity allows us to connect with a wide range of clients, ensuring that we can provide the best possible care for every individual and family who walks through our doors.
We pride ourselves on our ability to bridge the gap that often exists between generations, making it easier for teens and their parents to understand each other and work together toward a common goal.
Start Your Journey with Us
We offer individual, family, and group therapy, and we’re committed to helping you find the support that’s right for you. We understand that seeking therapy is a big step, and we’re here to make that process as smooth as possible. That’s why we’re happy to offer a free consultation to see if we’re the right fit for you and your family. If not, we’ll still help guide you to the support you need.
Don’t hesitate to reach out to us at (818) 697-8555. Whether you’re dealing with anxiety in teenagers, depression in teens, or seeking family therapy for teens, we’re here to help. We’d love to hear from you and start working together to build a happier, healthier future for your family.697-8555, we’d love to hear from you!
Online and Phone Sessions Available!
Teen Therapy Center is offering virtual therapy through platforms like Zoom, FaceTime, or via phone call. Whether you attend session in-person or from home, our therapists remain committed to providing a high level of care, compassion, and support for you and your family.
Online and Phone Sessions Available!
Teen Therapy Center is offering virtual therapy through platforms like Zoom, FaceTime, or via phone call. Whether you attend session in-person or from home, our therapists remain committed to providing a high level of care, compassion, and support for you and your family.
Our Latest "Tips on Teens" Video
Tips on Teens is our weekly segment on Facebook Live where Kent Toussaint answers your parenting questions. We cover a wide range of topics affecting teens and their families. We’ve archived all the videos right here on the site.
Click below to search our library of Tips on Teens videos for answers to your questions. As always, we love to hear your questions. Send them to us here.
Has your teenage son's communication style transitioned from English to grunts and shoulder
shrugging? Well, let's talk about that today on Tips on Teens. My name is Kent Toussaint. I'm
a licensed marriage and family therapist. I specialize in helping kids, teens, and families
to live happier lives. By the way, if you or someone you care for could really benefit from talking
to a family therapist, please contact us at Teen Therapy Center. Our information is down below.
Now, let's jump into today's parent -submitted question here on Tips on Teens. My 14 -year -old
son used to talk to me all the time. I used to feel really close to him. Now, when I get home from
work and try to engage him in conversation, I get a lot of grunts and no eye contact. When I do get
an answer, it's usually one word. And if I'm lucky, sometimes I get an, I don't care. Is this normal
for teens to just stop talking to the parents? The short answer is yes, I'm not condoning it.
Now the question really is, is it a problem?
So let's, let's figure out how much of this is a problem or just normal teen development. If your
teenager is still engaged with school activities, you know, their approach to school, their
motivation for school hasn't changed. They have friends. They get along with teachers and
coaches. If it's just kind of at home, it may just be typical teenage, that's the technical term,
that's the scientific term, right? Most teenagers go through it. It's part of the pushing and
pulling away from their parents. Here's one possible reason. It's not the only reason, but
it's a very common reason. So at 14, he's connecting more and more with his sexuality, sexual
identity, sexual thoughts, sexual feelings, all these are really present in his mind right
now, whether he's acknowledging them consciously or not. And when he does that starts recognizing
himself as a sexual being. He's really uncomfortable for his parents to see him as that and his
unconscious is if I see myself this way, everyone else sees
me this way, if my parents see me this way, that is really icky and gross and I don't want that.
Because if my parents see me this way and they can see what my thoughts are, then I have to have
some awareness that my parents may be sexual beings and this is very uncomfortable. This may
be a possible reason why. If that's the case, it's a pretty typical normal thing, it will not
last forever, but you're gonna have to ride it out. You're not going to force him to stop grunting
and shrugging his shoulders. Now however, if other things are sliding, if his schoolwork is
not what it used to be, if he's pulling away from friends, activities, his creativity is not
there, maybe something else is going on. Whether it was a traumatic event you don't know about
or it's just a slow spiral down to anxiety or depression or other maladaptive issues that are
going on. It Keep offering. Keep being there for him. It's not whether he accepts your offers.
It's more important that you continue offering. For
example, this example I use a lot. If you're making lunch and you go by his room and you offer to
make him a sandwich and all he does is, you know, he doesn't want one, that's okay. The important
thing is that you offered. Eventually, he may go, okay, can I have with mustard?" And you say,
sure. And that's him eventually accepting you back in. Again, it's you can't control what he
does. You can only control what you do. Take the high road, be the parent you know you are, and
don't measure your value as a parent or a human based on what your 14 -year -old, how he is reacting.
Because you can't control that, and his reactions are going to be illogical. It's part of the
development of a teenage brain. It's not fully developed. He's not an adult. Be patient and
continue having compassion and empathy for him. And he'll eventually come around and you'll
have a well adjusted, warm, friendly, teenage or possibly adult. Anyways, that's our question
for today. Thank you so much for your questions.
Again, my name is Kent Toussaint with Teen Therapy Center and the nonprofit organization,
Child and Teen Counseling. If you'd like me to answer your questions here on Tips on Teens every
Wednesday at noon, email us at tips on teens at teen therapy center .com or direct messages right
here on social media. We love your questions. Every Wednesday at noon on Facebook Live we answer
these questions. So keep them coming. Thank you so much again Kent Toussaint and I'll see you
guys next week. Bye bye
How does YOUR kid fit in?
"Ask Kent" at CBS Morning News
Our Clinical Director, Kent Toussaint, appeared on his ongoing segment “Ask Kent” at CBS Morning News. Kent answered questions from parents about REAL parenting issues.
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