Angry & Beligerent
I’m Ryan’s mom and I don’t know what has gone wrong. We’re all very scared actually. Ever since the start of middle school, his temper has been out of control. When things don’t go Ryan’s way, he lashes out at all of us. His sisters say that they are afraid to be in the house alone with him. He punched a hole in his door and two holes in his wall this month. He says it makes him feel better. I’m embarrassed that I have to walk on eggshells in my own house. But every time I try to ask him what is wrong he explodes. I’m scared that we have gotten to a place where I can’t even communicate with him. We try to give him space and we ask very little of him – just be nice to us, do some chores, and go to school. Anything we say could trigger an explosion with obscenities and threats. Who or what has hurt him so badly that he feels like he has to push us away like this? Now he’s sneaking out of the house at night, going who-knows-where. We need to do something soon. He might get caught up with drugs and alcohol and then really hurt someone or even himself. I’m afraid I’ve lost him already.
At Teen Therapy Center, we offer tools that help teenagers like Ryan to better understand the sadness, fear and pain boiling underneath all the uncontrolled rage and anger. In a non-judgmental environment, Ryan can feel listened to and understood. Feeling respected, he will eventually be able to hear others and experience shared empathy. As he acquires a stronger sense of self and a greater awareness of how he affects those around him, he will learn to communicate on a more mature level. He will develop skills to channel his aggression, understand boundaries of healthy assertiveness and build a lasting confidence that will serve him for the rest of his life.
Anger can be expressed in many destructive ways. Some can be subtle and some quite overt. If your kid struggles with uncontrolled anger toward others or even towards himself, Teen Therapy Center would like to help.