teen unsatisfied with second place at national competition
teen unsatisfied with high SAT score while parents praise her
thin teen with distorted self-image sees herself as fat in the mirror

Overachieving Perfectionist

teenage girl perfectionist looks insecure and holds sign reading "me 4 class prez."

Amy

Hi, I’m Amy! Most people already know me—I’m the student body president and the team captain for both the volleyball and speech & debate teams. My life is so over-the-top cool! On the outside, it seems like I have it all together, but the truth is, there’s a lot more going on beneath the surface. I hate that my parents are always on my case about not sleeping enough or forgetting to eat. They just don’t understand that I don’t need much sleep, and I’m so busy that I hardly ever feel hungry. Plus, I have this fear that if I let myself eat too much, I might gain weight, and let’s be honest, popularity would be out the window if I got fat.

This year is packed with amazing opportunities, and I should be on top of the world, but the pressure is intense. Sometimes it feels like my heart is going to explode—like I’m actually having a heart attack! It’s insane how everything has to be perfect all the time. What’s weird is that even when I win, I know deep down that I could have done better. My parents try to make me feel better when I don’t come out on top, but they just don’t get it. They don’t understand what it’s like to fail in front of the entire school, where everyone is watching and judging. Sure, people say I’m great, but what if they find out that I’m just a big fake?

It’s exhausting trying to keep up this happy, perfect image all the time. My friends expect me to be this bubbly, confident person, but sometimes I wonder what they would think if they knew the truth. If they realized that I’m scared of failing, scared of not being perfect. And what if I don’t get accepted to the best Ivy League schools? That would be the ultimate failure. I can’t even imagine what that would do to my life. It feels like everything would just fall apart.

At Teen Therapy Center, we understand the pressures that overachieving teens like Amy face. Our therapy for overachieving teens is designed to help them find a healthier balance in their lives. With the right support, kids like Amy can learn to recognize and address the obsessive thoughts that drive them to never feel good enough. This expanded awareness is crucial for helping them construct a broader perspective on life. Instead of basing their self-worth solely on achievements and trophies, they can begin to see their own value in who they are, not just in what they accomplish.

One of the key areas we focus on is helping Amy develop healthier friendships. In a world where competition and dominance often define relationships, it’s important for her to learn how to build connections based on mutual respect and shared experiences. This shift can lead to deeper, more meaningful relationships that are not contingent on winning or being the best. 

Through counseling for perfectionist teens, Amy will be guided to explore the underlying causes of her perfectionism. She’ll learn that it’s okay to make mistakes and that setbacks are a natural part of life. With our support for perfectionism, Amy will develop a wiser maturity that allows her to achieve her goals while also accepting life’s inevitable challenges. This growth will not only help her in the present but will also provide her with the tools she needs to navigate the future with confidence.

Additionally, we offer support for stress, which is often a significant factor for teens like Amy who are under constant pressure to perform. Learning how to manage stress effectively is essential for maintaining both mental and physical health. At Teen Therapy Center, we work with teens to develop strategies that help them cope with stress in healthy ways, allowing them to enjoy their successes without being overwhelmed by the demands they place on themselves.

Perfectionism can manifest in many unhealthy ways, often standing in the way of true happiness. If your child is struggling to get past their own obsession with perfection and isn’t able to enjoy life, Teen Therapy Center is here to help. Our therapy for overachieving teens and counseling for perfectionist teens provide the support they need to find balance and peace.

There are many unhealthy ways that perfectionism shows itself, however it almost always gets in the way of happiness. If your child can’t get past her own obsession and enjoy life, Teen Therapy Center would like to help.