How do you handle yourself when your Ex is turning your daughter against you?

Your Ex is an emotionally abusive narcissist who make every situation be about them. He’s turning your daughter against you. You want her to see the light, but when you try to talk to her it only turns into a fight, and the tension in your house is unbearable. How do you handle yourself? 

“I’ve been divorced from my abusive ex husband for five years. My daughter is 17, and she carries a lot of shame about being from a ‘ broken home’ which I believe my ex uses to manipulate her. She lives with me. He gets her every other weekend and occasional holidays. Even though he did not attempt to change the custody arrangement when it was being hashed out, he tells her I am trying to keep the two of them apart because he gets so little time with her. When I try to correct her it turns into an argument and she tells me I am “bad mouthing her dad.”

I’ve given my life for this kid. She has not spoken to me for nearly a year. The tension in my house is ridiculous. The minimal interaction she must have with me is dripping with disdain and disgust. I am crushed everyday when I go home to this environment. I believe in my soul that she knows the truth but it’s easier right now for her to believe a lie. What do I do until the truth surfaces and she has to deal with it?”