Help, My Kids Won’t Stop Fighting!

Modeling Positive Conflict

So your kids won’t stop fighting? Kids bickering is a normal part of human existence. In addition, it’s one of the ways they learn how and when to fight, and how to be assertive. It’s really important for parents to model for their children how to talk respectfully and how to resolve conflict. Are they watching you be patient, be calm, having empathy? Importantly, parents can still set boundaries, but if you model correctly, you’ll be way ahead of the game. 

Remember, It’s A Marathon…

When they do have those struggles, sit down and try to help them reframe what they’re saying in a positive way. It’s not a lesson you can learn one time, you have to do it many times. It’s more like a marathon. Kids fighting may just be something they need to go through. The more you intervene and model positive interactions, the more they can follow.

Here’s today’s Tips on Teens question:

“Help, my kids won’t stop fighting! It feels like my kids are fighting more and more lately. I have an 11 year old girl and an 8 year old boy. I wish I could say it’s a result of us all being together in the house more because of the past year in quarantine, but I really don’t think it is. It just feels like anything and everything that comes up turns into little arguments and bickering. I’m used to them arguing with us, but not with each other. They used to get along pretty well. How do I get to the bottom of this?”

Need another trick in your bag for when the kids are fighting? Check out “The Kindness Game.”