How to help your grandchild without being the “meddling grandparent.”

How do you help your grandchild without being a “meddling grandparent?”

What do you do if you’re a grandparent and you don’t necessarily agree with the way your adult child is raising their child (your grandchild)? You don’t want to see your grandchild get shortchanged, but there’s only so much you can do without alienating their mom or dad. Here are a couple tips:

DON’T

If you’ve already said your piece, shared your opinion and been told you are meddling then stop! Don’t have any expectation that your adult child is going to take parenting advice from you. The more you push it, the more push it you’ll push them away.

DO

Make time and build a connection with your grandchild. Play a game, walk the dog, get frozen yogurt. Build the connection and trust, and through that your positive values and unconditional positive perception of him may guide him to make better decisions.

You don’t have that much control, and the more you try to impose it, the more it will affect everyone negatively, but there’s no doubt that you can still have a positive impact.  We explore topic further in this Tips on Teens:

“I’m a Grandmother of a 13 year old middle schooler. He doesn’t do his homework. He barely does classwork. He failed English and Math for 2nd Quarter. Homework is considered ‘classwork you didn’t finish.’ His mom offers no support or encouragement, motivation or anything for him. Basically, she lets her son watch YouTube videos, every single day after school up until around 8 or 8:30 pm. That equals about 4 1/2 hrs each night of screen time. He is ADHD, which doesn’t help any. Talking to her does no good. She just accuses me of interfering and tells me to leave her alone. Any suggestions to help my grandson?”